It seems like you text messages are new oxygen of relationships. We use them to start relationships, keep them alive and sometimes we use them to end relationships.
I can see why it’s so popular: You can be whom ever you want to be when you text: Funny, sexy, interesting – The dream girl of every guy. Plus, you are well protected behind your phone. He can’t see of hear you and he can’t tell what you really think and feel. It’s the perfect hideout.
But, it has a big price to it, and thick books have already been written about it. Should I text him? How to seem interested but not too interested? How to not seem desperate or clingy? How many times can I text in a day? Should I text him first, should I text him last, how long to wait until I reply to his text – It’s EXHAUSTING.
Should You Text Him? Not Before You Learn How Guys Really Feel About it
You’ll be surprised to learn that a recent survey conducted by TSB magazine (an online dating advice and men’s interest site ) found that for guys, the most frustrating aspect of dating is trying to communicate with a woman via text messages.
The participants chose this to be the BIGGEST frustration in meeting new women and keeping romantic relationships.
They simply don’t know what to say in a text, how to express themselves properly in 160 characters, how to open a text, how to close, what to write in the middle, the whole thing is just a pain in the butt for them.
Guys hate texting!
I wasn’t very surprised by this survey. I’ve talked to (too) many guys and all of them don’t like having virtual relationships. They play along because it seems these days you can run but you can’t hide for the texting-mania.
3 Tips to Avoid the Texting Game (While Making Your Crush Happier)
You don’t have to be a part of the texting game. If you want to approach a guy, or get to know him better, there are better ways to achieve that than sending a silly text (while wasting hours thinking about what to text).
Here are some easy alternatives:
#1 – Do the “Unthinkable – Dial his Number
Think about it. Texting him first is already making the first move. You want to get to know him but he hasn’t approached you yet. Either wait for him to make the first move or decide to do it yourself. But instead of wasting days and possibly weeks of mindless chatting, just dial his number and call him.
It’s helpful to have an excuse for the call. For example, If you work with him, you can tell him that you lost your car keys and ask him if he happened to see them. You’ll be amazed at how quickly things can progress from a simple phone call, instead of a week of trying to be funny yet mysterious, sexy yet distant, on texts, mail and Facebook.
#2 – Avoid Long Distance Relationships
A long distance relationship is only doable if you have a maximum of 2-3 hours of travel between the two of you. If it’s more – The relationship will become dependant on constant texting, mailing, facebooking and chatting. It’s not a relationship, it’s hot air. This means constant tension and stress that wouldn’t exist otherwise.
Why didn’t he text today? Why didn’t he reply to my text immediately? Is he seeing someone else? Is he sending mails to other women?
If you can’t be with him face to face, it’s a virtual relationship. In other words, it’s a non-existent relationship.
#3 – Get him To Make The First Move
If he is in any way into you, you don’t have to text him. You can help him make the first move and ask you out on a date. These are a few guaranteed ways to get a guy to ask you out (again, if he is interested in you)
- Ask him for help – This method always works. Guys are genetically built to help “damsels in distress”. Ask him to help you out with something, like bike shopping, lifting something heavy (at your place of course), repairing something tricky, whatever you can think of. When he is done, thank him with your sweetest smile and ask how you can reward him. If he likes you in any way, he’ll pick up from there, I promise.
- Stare at him – But don’t look away when he catches you. Keep looking straight into his eyes and smile. That’s all you need my friends, and it’s better than any text in the world.
- Use your body language – Your body can convey a message way better than any text. Use open body language so he feels invited. If you are sitting, cross your legs in his direction with your free foot facing toward him. That says come over. The other direction says stay away.
There are literally dozens of more effective ways to approach, attract and keep a guy (that adores you). One of the best books I’ve read about this is “The Women Men Adore (and Never Want to Leave)” by Bob Grant.
If you are confused about guys, what they really want, how to find the right one for you and keep him yours and all those hundreds of relationship and dating challenges, I recommend that you read it too.
What do you think? Do you hate texting as much as guys do? Do you think it’s possible to have a relationship outside the 160 character limit? Tell me what you think below.
Rooting for ya,
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