- I thought things were going great. Why did he disappear? – The more I try to get close to him, the more distant and cold he becomes. – Why didn’t he call? I thought we had the most romantic night. – Where is he? He used to text and call me all the time, but suddenly he stopped. – Why do I always end up with the losers?
- Did I do something wrong?
Unfortunately, the answer to the last question is yes. You did something wrong.
But it’s not your fault. It’s not your fault that men think and act the way they do and it’s not your fault you followed your heart and said and did things without filtering. You CAN break down the toughest guy’s walls, make him beg for you to be with him forever, make him bend over backwards to please you – Without playing games. No more staring at your phone waiting for a text. No more “it’s not you it’s me”. No more disappearing acts. That is if you avoid making the deadly dating mistakes woman make, time and time again:
The Worst Dating Mistakes Women Make (Are You Making These?)
The following dating mistakes can turn off the most interested guy you’ve ever met, leaving you confused and upset, wondering what went wrong even when everything seemed perfect.
1. Jumping the Gun
Don’t start the race before the starting pistol is fired. Revealing your feelings for him before HE does, is the most common and sad mistake I hear about every day. You have to understand and accept that guys NEED a challenge. It hasn’t changed in the last million years and it never will (even if they won’t admit it!).
Telling him you like him / in love with him FIRST, eliminates the chase – A big turn off for guys.
Plus, what happens if he doesn’t feel the same YET? His silence will break your heart and all you’ll want to do is run away and hide under a rock. No matter how much you crave to tell him, you have to be patient and give him time to realize how he feels about you, before you say anything to him. By the way, this is true even if you are best friends and you know him and feel close to him. This is the worst way to start escaping from the friend zone. Asking him about how he feels, the awkward “do you like me” question, is a big no-no too, for the same reasons.
2. Needing, Clinging, Chasing
This mistake is yet again based on the fact that guys need the chase. Do not blow up his phone with calls and texts, no matter how cute they are. Do not look for ways to bump into him “accidentally”. And never ever call him or text him first after the first time you’ve slept together.
You can be the ultimate feminist and send him flowers and chocolate every day, or you can keep the man. It’s up to you.
According to relationship expert Michael Fiore, neediness is the #1 mistake women make when they try to make a guy fall for them. He explains how to avoid this mistake and make him worship the ground you walk on – Here.
3. Bed Time
Yes, I’m going to repeat the cliché. Sleeping with him too soon is still one of the worst dating mistakes women make – Of all time. The usual outcome is never hearing from him again. Even if it was perfect, even if you felt a connection, even if you cuddled until morning and he made you breakfast in bed. You need your guy to be attached to you emotionally before you are intimate. When he is head over heals for you before you have sex it will only deepen and strengthen your relationship, not tear it apart. You want to know WHY guys pull away after intimacy and how to make them regret it? The answer it HERE.
4. Ignoring Red Flags
Love is as blind as a bat. When you’re in love, noticing the red flags is chalenging, even if they’re blood red.
When a guy says “I’m not ready for a relationship”, or “I have trust issues”, or “it’s not the right time for a relationship” – Please believe him. He is not playing games. He’s telling the truth (for now).
Don’t be surprised that the moment things get serious (no matter how glorious the time you spent together was) he stops texting, calling and makes something up about his demanding job or his aunt’s sudden illness. I know it’s hard, but you can’t ignore the signs of an emotionally unavailable guy. The good news is that you CAN change things. You can break down his walls. See how to do it – HERE.
5. Long Distance Relationships
Having a long distance relationship is not a dating mistake. But starting a new relationship when you live hundreds of miles away from each other is doomed to fail and break your heart.
LDRs are hard enough for long-term married couples, but impossible for new couples, who know nothing about each other and are not even “officially” in love.
You’ll end up constantly missing him, wondering if he’s seeing other women, and spend your days counting his texts and over-analyzing every single word he says to you. Do yourself a favor and avoid dating from afar. Relationships are hard enough without this.
We are all controlled by our ego (mostly), but guys are especially tricky. Their ego is extremely sensitive to respect. In fact, a recent survey found that guys would rather be unloved and alone than unrespected. Most of them consider these 2 feelings as the exact same.
Unrespected = Unloved.
You may not be aware of it, but you can make a guy feel unrespected, completely unknowingly. And if you do it all the time, it may be the reason you can’t keep a man (or think you can’t). James Bauer explains all about it and how you turn any man from distant and cold to adoring, loving and ready for commitment – Using the respect principle.
7. Low Self Esteem
The way you think about yourself is the way others will think of you. If you put yourself down, focus on your flaws and your past mistakes, that’s how he will see you too. You don’t have to pretend to be someone other than yourself. Just avoid the negative self talk, like “why would anyone want to date me”, or “No wonder my ex boyfriend dumped me”.
Try to avoid apologizing frequently and exhibit self-doubting behaviors. Don’t look for constant feedback from him. Accept compliments.
Low self esteem is not voluntary, I know, but ways to overcome it are easy to find. Don’t let it destroy your chance of a loving relationship.
8. Marriage & Babies
Again, you have to let him lead. Just because you’re dating for a month now, doesn’t mean that you have to start talking about how your children will look like. Hinting or directly talking about your fantasy wedding day and the fact that you want 5 children is not recommended before you move in together and he’s the one initiating the talk.
9. Dirty Laundry
What ever you do, avoid talking trash about your ex boyfriends. In fact, do not talk about your exes at all, unless he specifically asks about them (he probably won’t). Guys want to be excited about a new relationship, instead of feeling they’ll have to “clean up the mess” from your past relationships. Plus, talking sh*t about your ex will make your guy realize that this is how you’ll talk about him too, if you break up.
10. Pleasing The Player
I know. Dating a player is so hard to avoid if you’re crushing on one. Players are usually charismatic, funny, attractive, and know their “worth”. They’re like a box of chocolates for the fasting monk. If you insist upon dating a player, do everything you can to stand out in the crowd. Do not be available to him at all times, say no, do not compliment him and build his his ego. That’s what all the other women he flirts with do. You have to be different. This is how to turn a hard-core player to a stayer – In 3 simple steps.
Can you imagine making any guy see you as his one and only? Making any guy you want adore you and show you the kind of affection you deserve, while fully committing to you? Avoiding the worst dating mistakes women make will get you 99% there. It’s so simple it’s embarrassing. What about you? What’s the worst dating mistake you always make?
Rooting for ya,
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